How To Get Out Of The Comparison Trap

Nov 03, 2022

Sometimes you can get caught up in the success of other people.  You start comparing where you are to where someone else is.  Perhaps, you don’t quite measure up.  Then, you beat yourself up over your lack of progress because you’re not quite where you’d like to be.  Success is not happening fast enough for you.  But, often you think other people achieve success quicker and for whatever reason, you start to think that it’s just not possible for you.  This comparison trap is not a healthy place to be.  Here are five things you can do when you find yourself in the comparison trap.


Your Success

First, show yourself some compassion.  Stop beating yourself up.  You have achieved success in now and the past, no matter how small it may seem.  Don’t belittle your progress and instead celebrate your success.  Show yourself some gratitude.  Be grateful for where you are and just how far you’ve come.  Remind yourself of the success you’ve already achieved.


What You've Learned

Next, write down your strengths and what’s gotten you to this point.  Such as ambition, hard work, consistency, determination, etc.  These characteristics make up your identity of who you are.  You should be proud of these traits.  These qualities have gotten you this far.  The journey to achieving your goals is not easy.  Reflect on what you’ve learned and how you’ve grown along the way.  Take note of what you’ve been through and how it’s made you a better person because of it.  Recall how your strengths have helped you get to this point.  You’ve learned a lot from your experiences.


Celebrate Success

Then, whenever you see someone else achieve success, celebrate.  Realize that this is proof that it’s possible for you too.  You’re not losing out just because someone else is winning.  You can succeed too!  Believe that your time is coming.  Cultivate positive energy by reframing any negative thoughts.  Trust that your future is bright and that your success is inevitably on it’s way to you.  Celebrate the success of others because you would want them to do the same and celebrate with you.


Real Competition

Remember that you’re only in competition with yourself.  You’re striving to be better than you were yesterday.  Don’t compete with others.  Focus on your own goals.  Where some else is in comparison to you has no bearing on where you are or what you can achieve.  This your journey.  Put blinders on and run your own race.  The only competition you face is the one looking back at you in the mirror.


Social Media

Lastly, avoid getting swept up in the social media comparison trap.  Social media is a highlight reel.  No one posts their massive messes and embarrassing failures.  Instead, social media is filled with beautifully curated posts that are perfectly airbrushed.  It’s not reality.  You don’t know what’s really going on behind the scenes.  You can only assume or guess, which won’t get you very far.  Life is not all rainbows and unicorns.  It can get tough.  Especially when you’re working hard to achieve your goal.  You can’t compare your life to someone else on social media who is only sharing the best parts because life has many ups and downs.



Avoid the comparison trap.  Show yourself some compassion and celebrate your success no matter how big or small.  Recount your strengths and what’s gotten you this far in life.  Remember your life lessons.  Next, believe that your success is inevitable.  Celebrate other’s success because it’s not a win or lose scenario.  It is proof that success is possible for you too.  Lastly, unfollow accounts on social media that you find yourself in the comparison trap because it’s not reality but just a highlight reel of all the best parts.  If success were truly documented and shared, you'd see the difficult moments.  But, rarely do you see the messy middle of the journey to get there.  Pull yourself out of the comparison trap so that you can focus on working to achieve your goal.  You can do this!


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